October 11th-October 16th 2012
Why wait? You can start your trip now. Novemeber 1st seemed distant, although the last minute delay in start date was a big relief as October proved planned, the immovable kind, obligatory and blessed. Joyful at times at others sorrowful. I traveled with rideshares to MA and VT and back for nuptials, deliverance and grief.
In North Carolina on October 11th Veronika received guidance that we needn’t wait to get on the road, we could start immediately. So the next day she accompanied me back up north to Massachusetts and we hit the road running. The entire adventure had been set in motion by months…. Years…. A lifetime’s manifestations. The very notebook I scrawl in is proof you create your own path to arrive at the destinations you believe in. We never questioned whether we were going, it was always going to happen. Our desire for it and innumerable other benevolent occasions is what attracted us to one another.
This trek, my experience and preconceived conceptions of it were originally expected in February 2012, ending at a wedding in Vegas with a group of individuals who passive aggressively excluded me every chance they had, unless of course they be high on cocaine in which case I’m hot and “the best thing that’s ever happened to Shane.” Well the final blow off in a long series of consistent broken dreams, the trip was all but forgotten. Miraculously, surrendering to the law of attraction, my on again/sort of off again partner manifests enough cash to fly to Vegas to celebrate the sanctity of marriage with coke and hookers. Needless to say I drove north. In a forest off 95 in GA I met Veronika, on Valentines day.
She was living and working at “the Hostel in the Forest” a community lifestyle priding itself on self sustaining features such as an organic vegetable garden, compost system and chickens- lots of chickens. Flocks of chickens. People living and working together in an easy harmony you just don’t see in any urban setting. Guests are given a tree house, delicious dinner, fresh eggs are up for grabs in the kitchen that you are welcome to use any time. This is the place that changes your life in an earth shattering, heart breaking way. You can’t leave the same, you are cleansed, encouraged, you emerge. Veronika had certainly. Her light drew my attention immediately. She wore a sweater with a tear, thick plastic glasses (like mine) and long thick curls tumbled around her, halfway down her back. She had grandmother energy, warm, kind, listening intently. There was a knowing between us and recognition right away. I felt this from everyone there, that is, the residents of the forest. I was the only guest that frigid weekend. I first discovered Veronika lived in Orlando, just blocks from me, when not in residence in the commune. From there we immediately made our link, her ex boyfriend and current friend of mine.
Its 8 months later and we’re creeping through Connecticut on 95 in Norwalk inching towards our first stop- Travis’s house. Early womanhood northern road trips to CT and NH on the weekends were taken with Travis in a casually romantic arrangement. Winding through the white mountains in his red mx6, blasting Free bird until summer ended and we rambled on... and set one another free. But Travis and I remained friends over the last ten years
The smell of his house is so loud you hear reggae music wafting up from the basement. Tiny eyes peek out of small and random frames throughout the purple walls. Travis? A father? In her 9 years we have not met so it may not be so.
At the head of the table Travis appeared to be a man of a harem, or so he wished. He was subtly trying to impress Veronika, but over gluten-free pasta and a variety of meats in sauce he was so delighted to make us we got lost in stories from the past. He reloaded our mason jar and showed us to our beds. It was the second best night of sleep in my life- second only to the first stop at Travis’s the previous weekend.
In the morning we rolled on through the rain to my least favorite state thus far, Rhode Island. I may have sped. I was delighted not to need directions any more. I took the time to note Veronika’s take on our travels, worried she may not appear to have much of a voice- only my experience of her experiencing this experience. My highschool English teacher, Ms. Allegrezza, just had a kitten.
This is what I managed to squeeze from my road tired, good spirited friend. “My ass hurts and so does the back of my heel halfway up through the back of my calf. I’ve learned I like to stay in the middle lane so crazy people can just go around me. It’s a happy medium.” She stopped and thought a minute. “12 dollars in tolls sucked! But NY was cool.” I remembered NY the night before and wondered if I should have tackled the city behind the wheel as I’d intended. She did beautifully, in her middle lane, while crazy people whizzed around us. “I want to take pictures, and you do the blogging.” I’m glad she rolls down the window before she farts. A man would wait to see if it smelled, then ventilate the space, maybe.
“This is great practice, you know? A dry run before we go west. We can plan, calculate, learn to minimize spending.” So here we took a break to create a list of must-stops, the mileage and estimated time between cities, the people with whom we could stay when we arrived and allotted rough outlines of time to spend in each place. We meditated first, agreeing to meditate before descending upon each check point, recalibrating before each city.
We didn’t include the drive back to the Blue Ridge or the work week in Florida, another dry run trip we’ve done several times. We began our schedule with the hostel.
Novemeber 2-5th Hostel in the Forest in Brunswick, GA 782 miles and 13 hours to Little Rock, AK. 882 miles and 14 hours Albequerque, NM. 350 miles and 6 hours to Sedona AZ. 462 miles, 8 hours to San Diego. 121 miles and 2 hours to Los Angeles. 295 miles and 5 hours to Big Sur. 141 miles and 3 hours to San Fransisco. 290 miles and 5 hours to Mt Shasta. 260 miles 5 hours to Eugene OR. 111 miles and 2 hours to Portland OR. 173 miles and 2 hours to Seattle. 860 miles and 14 hours to Jackson Hole, WY. 527 miles and 9 hours to Denver, CO. then we have 1837 miles a full 32 hours of driving to get back to Orlando.
Our “plan” and I use that word lightly, is to spend a few hours, a day or a few days in each place. We intend to work along the way. Our “dry run” to Massachusetts would be the calmative factor for Veronika’s logical and reasoning side. She spoke often on her concerns for fundage. I see fewer obstacles when money is involved. Life has shown many times over that money works itself out when you’re working in alignment with your soul path. And this trip is divinely guided and inspired.
Exactly one person booked a massage with me while in New England but after her session she inquired about my readings. I took the opportunity to introduce her to Veronika and we spent some time reading her, encouraging the beginning of this new journey. I told her we’d come back the following morning to clear the space and do some Reiki. As it would turn out I had no free time that Sunday as I was devoted to the affairs of a best friend’s wedding I was barely a part of for many reasons and with accompanying heart ache. So I sent Veronika.
Michelle is a type A mom with a dance studio and a long list of guilt driven activities. She gives more than she has in an attempt to lessen her guilt and as a result has literally run herself ragged. Her dog was recently injured and she’s now set up a bed on the floor by the crate in the guestroom, needless to say she needed her massage! She was open to all we had to share with her and was excited to have us return. Veronika reported a heavy resistance from the father and husband, Jack. Lana, the daughter of 16 exclaimed her hands were tingling after receiving Reiki! My hands lit up like that before I was first attuned to the Reiki Energies, too. It’s exciting to me that a teenager is interested in the healing arts, the younger you start the easier it is to learn, just like language.
The experience left us both feeling a refreshed sense of purpose and worthiness. It dawned on us that evening, if we remain open minded and pay attention we will encounter abundance and serve our mission on this our Healing Tour. We worked to fund our trip as manifested!
We’d rolled into town, as aforementioned, with abundance of our own, and stopped to share with Vicki, my sister’s best friend, homeschooling mother of 5 and partaking enthusiast. She greeted us at the door, her cheeks bright and eyes as twinkling and drawing as always. She grabbed me for a hug, “and what might that be?” She asked knowingly, slyly, referring to the magical mason jar nestled in my sweater. Three toeheads were present, blinking, warming to recognition of “auntie”. They’re my nieces’’ and nephews’ closest friends and so hear about “auntie” all the time, so to them I was born with that name. Even though they, too, have an auntie. We hit the garage where Boomer the slightly stupid and ridiculously friendly Rottweiler leapt up the steps to love on us. Sonny the Rat Terrier sat, unhappily nearby. The puppy that outweighs him by 100 lbs, gets all the attention these days. I motioned for him to come.
Three cups of tea later Vicki had shared with us her adventures in Chi town, filled me in on her mom’s health, friends’ drama, that’s become her own, and we revisited the week before when we’d helped Amy bring Calvin Laurance into the world. A Blake child finally named for me! Vicki, Sam and I had waited on Amy hand and foot that night. I twisted and contorted over my sister, massaging and sending Reiki, slipping undetected from her path each time she adjusted. Vicki lit and moved candles around as I did, so as not to light my hair aflame. Glow sticks illuminated the water green, Vicki captured the most beautiful moments of our lives on film. “Its not just anyone who would sit in a tub of amniotic fluid with me…” Amy mentioned, and it slowly dawned on me that I’d been sitting in a tub of amniotic fluid all night.
Here, in Vicki’s garage, I first became aware of Veronika’s quiet. A new place with a woman who speaks a hundred miles an hour- she would soon learn this is the way people communicate here, you wait for a breath and interject- It occurred to me there may be much, much more silence.
More twinkling blue eyes surrounded in outrageously blonde hair peered joyfully from the window as we left Vicki’s.
Food was, of course, abundant at my sister Amy’s house. In fact, a text from her asked, “where are you???” and I responded with a picture of myself grilling egg and vegan cheese gluten free sandwiches on her stove. Her family is fed a gluten and dairy free menu so we were showered with tasty food we could both eat! The kids were delighted with Veronika; Mya stole away with her any chance she could get. They surrounded her in the kitchen in awe of her crystals so unlike the polished and raw stones they are aware of. Two year old ginger Sawyer “oooohed” at all of them and was in severe danger of being eaten! She patiently followed everyone’s beckoning, stories and games. Amy and I included her in incense time in the bathroom. We discussed the likelihood of including details like incense time into the blog. We decided subtle hints and name changes would be appropriate. The hospitality of my sister’s family humbled me, a place on earth I will always be welcome.
I see myself through the eyes of these I moved away from and I feel guilt, I want to always be with them but am dragged on out to the world.
It was a completely different experience having Veronika with me among the homes of family and friends. She reminds me of my growth since I’ve been away, which is the very thing our friendship brings forth and I adore it. She keeps me true to myself, whereas at home I tend to slip into old patterns that no longer serve me. That being said, I was forced, vibrationally, to realize and release these patterns, habits… even people.
She was so graceful in the face of adversity. I have always been confronted with its ugliness throughout life and it was not my first time at the rodeo. However, I did not ever expect it from the women I considered close enough to me to be sisters.
They were awful. It was the evening of the bachelorette party, one no one had any intention at all in planning. Weeks before I had suggested a few things, at the very least we get together. I was met with immediate difficulty, negativity and rudeness. The number one argument was “its too short of notice.” I was stunned… we were only given three weeks notice for the wedding!
When the day arrived finally, I had Veronika with me. In the next hour they would go from excited and chattering to biting and sarcastic, exclusive and nasty. Two things were apparent, that we were not welcome and no one was going to admit it. So we sat quietly, finding our own table as the one available had only enough room for… well everyone but us. Even the bride, my best friend of 20-some-odd years, took the Karaoke mic, sang a song meant to be a duet for us. She would not slide her chair when I attempted to sit back down.
Veronika exclaimed “I’m ready if you are dude, I don’t have to stay here for this.” My guilt held me there a bit longer, until ruder, nastier things were said and done. Then I was ready.
I fell asleep angrily, after an hour or two of considering the night’s occurrences, visualizing responses that would have satisfied the most clogged of throat chakras. I just don’t live like that anymore. I don’t understand behavior that intentionally hurt others. Blame it on mass hysteria I suppose. I awoke with the beginnings of a cold.
I ached to speak to the bride regarding this madness, but decided to hold back, like I did on her birthday years ago, knowing my boyfriend and I were on the outs, but not wanting to spoil her fun then, and I loyally swallowed my pride this day, too.
Things had calmed down by the next day; people seemed preoccupied with their own hangovers to give any more undeserved shit. Despite everything, Veronika joined in the preparations and final wedding details.
A private conversation with the bride concluded, I was, in fact, the point or at least a point of contention, bore of misunderstandings, assumptions and just plain bitchy women. It occurred to me at the moment, and I reflect now, all the people I have always loved have stayed the same. But I have changed so much, far beyond that of their standards on acceptable appearance, that I am no longer part of them. Or most of my friends for that matter.
I may add more about the awesome wedding, the one bridesmaid who wasn’t acting like a complete jerk and the time I spent that day with my high school sweetheart, then again, maybe I wont. I just needed to get the fuck out of town after that. So I woke Riley and Griffin for tear streaked, loved filled goodbyes, Held onto Amy so long and hard she would feel my arms for weeks to come and ease the sorrow losing a little sister brings, and we pushed out.
“Its over,” I said, “the trips for everyone else. Now its all about us.” I was unsure about Chicago, but after what I put Veronika through, I couldn’t bear to say no.
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